i nvr failed any exam before. this sucks. moral. 36. excuse me. me? fail? nvr. i'm jus wondering how to break the news. but as a plus point my english got 95. but moral. i nvr cared much for it. i mean. its stupid crap. i cud f it here but since i don swear. tell me. how do u learn moral by memorising the nilai and their meanings? i mean. don tell me the TEXT BOOK has to TELL you how to help an old lady cross the road. and what that means. kasih sayang. perasaan cinta yg mendalam dan berkekalan yang lahir dari hati yang ikhlas. don tell me tht i have to know what love means before i can love someone? it doesnt EVEN make common sense. what abt those ppl who dunno what it means in words, literally. they don't love? stupid.

i mean the subject is a waste of time, energy and resources. we could be learning other things instead of how to write a good essay with the correct format for a meaningless subject. in the end, do the students who score in the moral paper have good moral conduct. NO! does it mean that the person who is the highest is the best person in class? NO!! the kindest person in class who has the biggest heart may not score high. and the top scorer may be a jerk for all you know. its a stupid subject. doesn't teach you at all to be a btr person. as much as the government wants it to. pls la. you learn how to be good thru examples and people around you. not in a text book! the pendidikan ppl reli have to make this subject a more practical one if they intend to teach ppl abt morals.

and i havn started on the facts that we have to memorize out of the book. the names of the bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki are part of moral? you mean we have to know the names of them before we can be good people? names of a bomb? i'll give you bomb la. shit bomb. and thats not all tht can come out in exam. the akta-akta, persidangan and unions our country is involved in oso must know. how is all this suppose to make us btr ppl wit good moral conduct? this is general knowledge! not moral!

but anyway. i'm not talkin abt moral. i'm talkin abt my results. i'm gonna lose to so many ppl in class la. i mean, i got crap marks pls. i noe got ppl worse then me. i'm sorry. we gotta work harder then. lots more. hols is gonna be study time. add math, physics, chem. all have to work. i must understand everything before i get to form 5. otherwise i die.

today was perpisahan. form 5 and upper 6 leaving skul. study for spm and stpm. taking photos all. nxt yr we gonna be lyk them. cry. and then spm. scary... oh well. btr start workin on it now. i must do well the nxt time. how funny. i always say tht. and it nvr turns out good. oh well... i will. wit fan 4 and sunny helpin me and me helpin them, we gonna make it thru the rain.

aah... exam papers back, more planning for the party. i love skul! haha. well sometimes anyway. wit sher in another class and sze away, me and rah have to do lotsa things. but i love it! when sze comes back, we'll let her do everything! hahahahaha!!! well i guess we're almost done so yea. i think ms lee not comin today so after i finish this only i go and do theory.

oh abt exam results, i didn do as well as expected. but then who ever does? i wonder, i don reli feel sad abt it. lotsa ppl are lyk don wanna talk abt it. guess they must be reli unhappy. i'm ok wit it la. exam only ma... haha but i stil do study a bit. i think i very lax la my thinkin. which is good and not good. or maybe i train myself aredi to jus aiya don care attitude. it doesn't hurt as much as worryin over results. i mean, why put yourself thru hell? when you can jus shut yourself out. i guess mayb cos we're chinese. ok mayb i offend ppl here la. i can do it, so i guess everyone is lyk me. actually i'm pretty normal so i gues, if anyone tried, they cud be lyk me. i care enuf abt my results to study, but not enuf to care abt how well i do as long as i maintain my position. surprisingly yin nang did reli well this term. mayb btr than khar mun? we shall see. khar mun is genius la.

jus replied sook yee's e mail. tho we're not close, amazing i stil talk to her. usually i nvr bother you noe? wit frens.. ok tht sounds horrible. i mean i don usually keep in touch wit them la. jus not me to do it. mayb i got it from my mum. but thts no excuse. well its good tht i'm tryin now to at least talk to ppl. mayb i'll turn out to be a recluse, unsociable person. what happened to me i wonder? i noe when i was a kid many ppl liked me. well in my mind. i had plenty of frens. very friendly and a lot of adults liked me. it looked like i had good potential. i guess thts gone now. i'm not braggin, im jus sayin what i was like. mayb cos of tht thinkin oso i end up a bit snobbish. major turnoff yea...

i'm sorry tht i didn catch them up too you noe. its not good to leave your friends behind. but ppl change, you change, i change. how friendly are friends anyway? i guess a definition of a true friend is one who always helps you out when its good for you, scolds you for doing the wrong things but sticks by you no matter what and best of all, the minute a true fren steps into your door, he or she heads straight to your fridge and grabs a beer. hmm... seems like i don fulfill my own requirements. but true friends are hard to come by. a true friend of someone may not be a good friend of another.

out of my resolutions, i stil havn accomplished:
1) cleaning my room
2) putting my essays into the comp
3) exercised enough
4) studied

well at least i did some right? i practiced piano, did some of the character descriptions. oh and i did my future house floor plan. haha! i wanted to design my house on impulse after readin haven magazine. but i only finished the floor plan. oh well. december hols shud be enough for tht.

party party party... its all i can think of. and sunny of cos. that one don need to say la.. character descriptions. lots to do. need to give sher a call ltr too.

my 100 bucks cheque in the wrong name. crap la.dunno why they lyk to change my name. my name so nice. and for security reasons my name is not gonna appear here.

tell u the yr end party is gonna be fab. no one in our form i think, has hosted a murder mystery party. hopefully we get enough ppl cos the qms are havin a camp on tht day. of all days why pick tht day? the trip however, is not turnin out well. we can't get any teachers to come wit us and sarah's mum cant make it. mayb pn t will be good enuf to go wit us. otherise we go kaput.

i wanna spend time wit sunny and the fan 4 la.. oh and the sad thing is before the party im on duty for worship. so i cant help them do the final preparations. sad. no cookin anymore. tho im the foodie in the group. haha.

pls is this blog boring or wat? im supposed to be a genius writer wit all the fancy words and musings and stuff. wat hapen to ur brain girl? bla.. mayb the juices will flow ltr. but mayb i shudn blame myself. rite, its writers block. not my fault. haha. is tht even supposed to be funny you say. well i dunno. isn it up to u to decide.

decisions make your life. jus like a turning in the road takes you to another diff place. you dunno the way, mayb u get lost. or u meet some nice stranger, you get back on track. to me, life is always like a road, with twists and turns. you never noe where there's a road block unless you listen to the radio with its traffic updates. then the bumps on the road slow you down but you'll always manage to go on. and holes in the road? jus get a crane to get your car out. sometimes you got passengers. they may be buggy, irritating or unbearable. but hey, thats life for you. the package comes with problems, joy, laughter and people you meet. lovely ain't it? but God is always watchin our journey. which is very comforting to me. i mean, you got someone lookin after you. forever. how good is that? humans will fail you. God nvr does.

ok been reading other ppl's blogs and mine is so formal, uptight whatever.. jus gonna relax, write rubbish and what nots ppl don care to read anyway. my phone has got a new casing. its called crystal casing although its jus a silly old plastic thing to cover my phone. my cacated, dropped a million times nokia! i tell u nokia tahan lama. so many stories abt nokia. why don everyone buy leh? sad..

alright, mystery party! we havn started the write up of the descriptions yet.. thx to fabulous me, we've got the format. sarah's got a cunted idea. appointment at 4 wit her to discuss it. on the phone. duh. u wudn tink i have tht much money to go out everyday do u?

i changed. wit my braces off and specs off, i look so diff from last yr.. lyk totally diff person. lookin thru photos of last yr and last last yr, i look so much prettier and grown up. no!! why? why? tell me? lost childhood. shatered dreams. where's it all gone? no...
na... dramatica.

sunny's phone is cacated la. mayb gettin a new phone. nokia of cos. the canggihier ones of cos. using his dad's now. but wht do u care rite? i do. and ps, tht matters most. its his only tool to communicate wit me. alright i noe we can call but its so bloody exp it sucks my money dry.

oh dear, Fai is here. here comes the buggy bro taling over the comp.........

ah... school holidays are here. usually i just laze around but this time, i've resolved to make myself useful. by: composing this blog, cleaning up my pig sty, inscribing my exam essays into the computer, contemplating on taking up ballet lessons, brainstorming for Fan 4 year-end party (murder mystery party!!), practicing piano, studying (i wish!), exercising etc.

i've just noticed, other people make their resolutions at the beginning of the year. i however, make mine at the end. who cares, its only a few months difference. but then again, a year is 12 months difference. a month is 4 weeks difference, a week is then 7 days difference. and a day, 24 hours difference, an hour, 60 minutes difference and one minute, 60 seconds difference. altogether, that really makes a very big difference. even a second is a lot of nanoseconds. so if you think about it this way, each and everyone of us is making a huge difference on the world. small as we are, insignificant even, we still make an impact on the world by our existence. words of encouragement. there's a book i read that shows how important and what a victor everyone is. imagine, how many sperm it took to fertilise an egg. out of those thousands of sperm, only one made it through. and that one, made you. how cool is that? thank God for sperm and eggs.

right, this morning i went to victor's place together with YE (Young Enterprise Program, i'm an assistant director) people to discuss the presentation for the best annual report. UPDATE!! our school company is in the running for best company cos we won the best annual report and the second runner-up for best product. CHS rocks! we're only in our first year and we already have such an achievement. who the man? we the man... right, back to today... after a very distracting discussion, which included photos, computer games and food in the mix, the rest left for Bryan's house to go karaoke. and Sunny wanted to go. silly boy didn't want to leave me alone at vic's place. oh well... isn't that sweet?

yes, and then i had to bathe the dog. he smelled bad. very bad... but in the end, i smelt worse. any guy who loves me in that state after washing my dog and gives me a hug, is mine. the worse brings out the best in people huh?

Land of ancient ruins, lotus flowers, beautiful people and flooded plains, Cambodia is one of the most beautiful countries I have visited. The locals live a carefree, happy life, despite of their poverty. They laugh much and are very friendly. Adorable dark-skinned children sell souvenirs and pester you to buy their wares. Mini processions of lorries jam-packed with villagers, head to pagodas to give offerings, through dusty, bumpy dirt roads. When it rains, village children roll in mud and swim in little pools. That is their entertainment. Paddy fields can be found everywhere on the outskirts of town, always flooded and full of water.
Our driver-cum-guide, Mark (actually his name is Markaraleng, which means January) speaks English. I can never forget his laugh and the way he pronounces the word ‘vegetables’ as ‘chetables’. Toilets are called ‘happy house’, and pigeon, quail, bird and chicken all mean the same to him.
Tonle Sap is an eye-opener, actually the whole trip was one. How the people live there is so different from life in KL. On the huge lake, people live on the water, fishing out a living on the muddy waters. They also have fish and crocodile farms which also offer cold drinks to tourists. Everything here is based on the US dollar for the tourists and prices are often double what the locals pay. But we don’t mind as it gives the people here a chance to have a better life. The village on the lake is very picturesque and offers many photo opportunities. Never come here without a battery charger or extra rolls of film. The scenery and people is always beautiful and often breathtaking. Luckily ours ran out only at the end of our trip.
Out of all the temples we visited, I find Angkor Wat, Bayon and Bantaay Srey the top three ones to visit. These three have different and distinct styles of architecture and are the most magnificent sites to see. It is definitely an experience and is one of the most impressive monuments in human history. Words won’t be enough to describe the enormity and grandeur of the temples, you really have to see it for yourself. And get a guide book. Read it before visiting the temples as it really helps, especially if you don’t have a guide to help you understand the carvings and point out interesting pieces.
Cambodia really is a beautiful place with beautiful people and a beautiful culture. As Dad noted, city people work so hard just to make money so that we can enjoy comfort and a good life in later years. But here in the villages, they already enjoy their life.
There’s a story about this ironic cycle. A rich man said to a fisherman, ‘You see, I work so hard in the city, so that I can enjoy life, eat good food. Now I can relax, enjoy, take in the fresh air, stay at the countryside, fish at the river and just take things easy. No fuss, no muddle, no hurry.’ And you know what the fisherman said to that?
‘I already have all that.’