giving everyday my best shot
Friday, December 15, 12:04:00 pm
a lil bit abt the real me

yo... yes, after readin abt daniel's bad ankle, i'm inspired to tell u guys abt my clumsiness. tho i have no idea why i reli wanna tell u abt it. if anyone sees my legs, the first thing they'll notice is the number of blue blacks i've acquired. the second is how awful my legs look. but that is another story. every blue is a reminder, every black is an experience. haha.. hey! nice sentence. hmm... mayb i could even write a story about my bruises. no, i have nvr been abused. but major problem is i nvr remember where and how i got my blue blacks. i'm so klutzy, my bro describes me as "she takes every opportunity to bang, knock, fall down or hit something." terribly accident prone. haha..
but thinkin about bruises, we've all got them. physically and emotionally. so guess they are reli a reminder and experience huh. scars will heal, eventually. time, is a healer. daniel u got that? check out 1 corinthians. i forgot which verse but there's one about love. somethin lyk love is patient love is kind. it does not demand... or something. love nvr fails. and love isn't only romantic love, what abt family and friend love? and God's love is the best of all. ok gtg.
Monday, December 11, 8:35:00 pm
time for a lunch break

by lunch break i mean break lah... from me to ME! whatever.. to get this blogger beta, i had to make a new email account pulak. unavailable247@gmail.com. ahuh... no this DOES NOT refer to my marriage status. but it can tho.. haha. i dunno it sounded cool. come to think of it i shud have put available instead of unavailable. such a turn off..hmm.. shud i go make another account? haha that is wat the hols do to u. so free until u have nothin btr to do and go make new email accounts. oo..mum may bring me to isetan tomoro. we got vouchers. haha.. i know i'm a lucky girl.
besides that, i have somethin to say.yest i talked to God. seriously, looked lyk i was talkin to thin air. no i'm not hallucinating. but its lyk thoughts jus pop into my head. and i felt good after that. lyk i jus let go of everything and let God jus run my life for me. i don need to care for anything. cos God takes care of the flowers. and who clothed them in their abundant colours? God. yea jus somethin imp i feel i wanted to share.
nxt wk is gonna be busy. may not have time to post. have to do some spring cleaning too. no materialistic. no materialistic no materialistic!! ah..
watched project runway. nice. i lyk. haha mum said she cud design btr dresses. dad said HE cud design even btr. so i said: so why don u 2 jus join together and make fabulous dresses?! parents..
ah enough. no... mummy not bringin me to isetan tomoro. on the 26th haha.. rite after christmas. oh well, btr late then nvr.
Sunday, December 10, 3:19:00 pm
mah close frenz...

rah rah...
hui yee and sze. at scout campfire '06
sherz, me and the red chicken bryan says i killed XD





sunny! wit his specs off.




ahem...introducing fan 4!





haha...that was on purpose. before the halloween party shoppin a yr ago





ah liao and i. a photo of a photo(explains the mysterious light)








3:07:00 pm
my stuff

3 "treasures" PS i'm not that into red tones. I love blue!!

birthday present from sunny. it came with an orchid! how sweet...PS the background is my bed


i lyk the blook label design. the notebook and greeting card are handmade! by yours truly



bag o' goodies




ahahaha...
















Saturday, December 9, 12:55:00 am


THE infamous and irritating star. looks lyk monkey?

12:47:00 am
pics to satisfy you. crazy ones.




this is us at my ex-bm tuition class. farah, me and atthiya. Note: the upside-down dictionaries


kenny, asst. blogg leader. gues wat he's doing?

12:30:00 am
hello... i'm being friendly k. not weird, frenly.

look look. i can be nice. ask my frens. as for being sociable, its gonna have to start soon. i mean, i can't jus go around not living life, knowing ppl rite? cheers to being sociable. now if only i had the will to keep being frenly. to ppl i dunno. whom i don usually tok to. life, u only live it once/ oh what the heck. jus go for it! give it a try at bcomin a frenly bubbly chatty person! it couldn't hurt.
yes.. hi everybody! i read chicken soup for the soul today. a few stories. and it got me blubbering lyk a baby. i'm not usually sentimental mind you. in fact i'm prob more cold and unfeeling. but reli touching the stories. and motivational. i mean, human capability is fascinating. on one hand u got ppl who strive hard to achieve their goals and dreams. jus on sheer will power. on the other u have drug addicts and thugs, rapists the like. who don reli go for perfection and good things. but in the end, what happens? i gues u cud say the ppl who achieved their dreams, have a fulfilled, good life. and they have inspired many ppl. but then again, thinkin deeper, what is good or bad anyway? a standard the masses have set. to measure up against? to me it wud be Jesus as the perfect example of someone perfect. He is perfect in the first place.
Inspiration. and the power of a smile. how good it is. goes a long way. and basically quoting someone. "it couldn't hurt". its free anyway. and its 2 way. smiles jus brighten up the giver and the receiver. more of it wud make the world much cooler than fashions and trends.
i'm gettin tired. eyes closing... but its ok. i gave up on tht essay. the perdana one. jus cudn be bothered anymore. what i need is will power. lots of it. and discipline too. admire those who can keep going and have the drive for excellence. in short sentences now. sleepy. PS think my blog is gettin boring. love li may's and li ee's blogs. she gonna go a long way. chaoz. from sleepy me.
Sunday, December 3, 3:26:00 pm
hey guys. i'm stil upset over those comments.

but i shudn let them get to me rite? life is about choices. and we always can choose what to do or what not to do. you know i actually feel lyk takin that particular post and editing it but i don think i shall now. sigh... let it be, let it be...
ok, back to happy self. switch! heyo wats up ppl! either i'm faking this or i reli am happy. oh well, its good to be happy. and now i shall turn off unhappy thoughts and revert to being happy so i can forget and move on. ok! i've decided to join this perdana essay writing competition. although its a factual essay (kinda), the prizes are reli attractive. malaysians take note! if you're 13 to 25 yrs old, and interested, the contest titles are mostly about our country. u can check it out at http://www.perdana.org.my/portal/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=283&Itemid=99&limit=1&limitstart=2. there's ipod nanos, complete comp workstation, a car(!!), scooter, laptop and handphones. wa............................ if only i can win man.. and thre's interview too! lyk press conference. i hope i can win la. consolation oso not bad wei.. but best is stil the ipods.. oh well. dateline is dec 31. so i actually have to finish by...nxt wk? lots of stuff to do. ooah... don need to study di. shit lor... promise to study the whole hols dunno do wat only. don care la.
sunny isn't back yet. oh! i didn tell u guys i went to blook wit my mum dat day. and i got a pair of shorts, short denim skirt, cargo pants (bet you everyone is gonna call me carrot, but i love the boldness of it anyway) and a red short skirt. boy... best ever clothes i have. and also my more daring ones. those skirts are the only skirts i have! i'm normally a jeans person. but hey! great sale la. blook wor... and good quality some more. okok, i'm a stingy person. ok not stingy but jus watch my money carefully. all my clothes bought on sale. mayb to some of u thts not reli stingy. yea i noe, pasar malam clothes only stingy ma... but many of my frenz don get their clothes on sale. which i think is ok if ur rich but not if ur middle class. oh well, money is only in this world. i'm blessed enough. thank God i even have clothes to wear.
see? am i back to normal? i gues so. its a good way to forget things. by concentratin on the happy things. yay! don need to borrow my mum's stuff so much. i wonder if many girls borrow their mum's clothes. so far, i havn met anyone who shares lots of stuf wit their mums. sometimes my entire outfit is from my mum's closet. esp if its a big dinner we have to go to. but now, since i got my red dress(from blook again), not so much need. but then again that dress is a bit too formal. and i'm growin up and becomin more daring wit my clothes so not so much need too la. but then again i love my mum's clothes so.. hehe..
sometimes she has a big dinner lyk the recent fashion week. she didn have anythin nice that wud fit the theme, night of the orient. so she has this blue peacock shawl from china. and then she jus wrap it around herself and wala! instant outfit! and it looks good too! jus wear a tube underneath. and i helped her arrange it! try out diff wrapping styles. so yea. but musn't be too materialistic. eek.. i wore my new denim skirt to church today. hope it wasn't too short. cos all my jeans got washed and i'm saving the carrot cargo pants for christmas. nobody stared, i hope.
then we went and took photos for makin passport. and mine turned out nice! i actually look good. usually i don't. my mum was complaining she looked awful but she didn la.. look good for her age. hope my kids look good too! shud be ok la.. sunny is good lookin accordin to my mum. i tink.. mezzo mezzo. that is supposed to mean moderate in italian(?), accordin to sze.
hoi! time to go write that essay! oh.. i've got so much to do.. see ya round soon!
Saturday, December 2, 10:18:00 pm
i'm hurt and angry. but i know tht i'm wasting energy over ppl who don't deserve my energy wasted over.

i'm hurt and i'm angry. gues why? bcos some weirdos said this blog is shitty. i know they are entitled to their own opinion yea. so i'll try to be nice. mayb they are jus a bunch of weirdos lookin for attention, or mayb they got the wrong blog. i mean, I don't go around insultin other ppl's blogs tho i don reli lyk them. sigh... they have to do this to me don't they? but God pls help me feel good abt myself. tht this blog is not shitty. i meant this blog as a musing of my life. of what i observe. and to help other ppl if i may. i shudn care abt wht ppl think right?
i wanna burst actually. reli actually. bcos i am human. and humans do nasty things. most are capable of nice things too. mayb the ppl who commented and said my blog sucks reli don appreciate wht i write. or mayb wat i write reli isn't good at all. but who cares rite? i got a compliment at least from an unknown guy. thank you anton sampras. whoever you are. but whre are the ppl who can comfort u? God alone is my strength and my shield. sigh...
i feel btr now. bloggin reli helps. life is lyk that. there are ppl who can insult you, make u sad and angry but you know that God is watchin over you. and for the number of ppl hu insult u, thre are an equal number if not more who care for you and love you. may this help anyone readin my blog. it was written sincerely and from me being recently insulted.
ah... now i can spill out my feelings for the ppl who insulted me. look, i don reli care if u guys are readin this, but nywayz, i hope it makes u think twice abt insultin other ppl again. don't do unto others wht you don wan others to do unto u. i know, ur basically cowards cos the internet is such a big place. but i bet u, that if u knew me reli, u wudn say that to my face. bcos i don deserve it. no one deserves their blog to be called shitty. insults are bad, comments are good. i mean I don insult your blog, i don insult anyone's blog. or mayb u guys are a bunch of 12 yr olds tryin to act lyk grown ups. ok wait. deep breath. i must keep calm bcos these tak han mou si zhou ppl don deserve my attention and wastage of my energy at gettin angry at them. bcos they simply don understand me and don know me. oh wait, mayb i shud scold them in chinese! then they won know wht i mean. unles they're chinese. oh. haha... good i can actually laugh now. hands up ppl who support me! i love you guys! and the freaks who insulted me too! haha.. cos God say turn the other cheek. tho i doubt these ppl understand basic courtesy. they probably spit on the road, throw rubbish everywhre, curse, smoke, swear. ah... enough. i must get to lyk these guys! i mean, Jesus said to his tormentors, they know not what they do. so yea. i am tryin to do tht.
eh chaoz ppl! and whoever supports me, thanks loadz! cos i know that thre are ppl who are nice too!
Friday, December 1, 10:45:00 pm
lets put up an interesting title shall we? interesting enough?

i love daniel's blog! i mean i don love daniel cos i'm not the kind of person hu thinks tht cos i lyk the person's ability or work then i love the person. eg. fans of pop stars. i'm not personally a fan of any star but i tink justin timberlake and rain dance reli well. note: i tink they DANCE reli well. i don love them jus cos of that. mayhap u tink i'm a boring person cos i'm so moderate most of the time.
okok i'm not perfect i know! i mean, i THINK i'm moderately patient, i moderately lyk things. wht i'm tryin to say is tht i'm not overly obsessive or compulsive or disorder. ok mayb im not moderately messy in fact i'm super messy! wonder how my hubby gonna live wit me. but i'm moderate in lots of things. i'm a moderate normal person. which is not wht i reli want or mayb it is i don even know. but i do know tht i'm different bcos everyone is diff. so wht i'm reli crappin abt is tht bein normal and bein diff is actually ur own thinking, view point, state of mind and a thousand other words that all mean the same thing=your opinion. actually the way ppl look at life is always interesting since thre are so many ppl out thre, they all think differently on all sorts of things. i'm technically stating the obvious but in a roundabout way. i mean, think abt it. its nice and interesting to think tht the world is such a huge place but sometimes you can meet an old fren in a city far from ur hometown. or well, u even are frens wit tht fren even tho thre are so many ppl out in the world. u got the chance to BE tht person's fren, and he/she yours. its good to think tht. and thinkin abt life keeps u young i believe. and blogging too! hehe..
but i was goin to say somethin. i find tht i am a very lazy doin-nothin kind of person. first, i don keep up wit frens, i don bother to make frens, i don bother keepin my family happy, i don even bother gettin to know my extended family lyk cousins, grandparents, aunts or uncles. heck, tht is supposedly sad but i don even feel guilty! mayb slightly but yea.. wht kind of person is this? tht is so lonely and selfish and anti social?!?! i oso dunno. see, i wasn lyk this. when i was young, i was always bubbly and happy and i loved to be the center of attention. stil do but i don even work for it. i have now a reli tidak apa attitude towards life. how can? i mean this is NOT good.
anti socal? i suppose so. i'm lyk pretty secluded from the outside world. lyk my dad says, always wrapped up in your own tiny world. and here i was tellin u guys to think abt the whole big world.
gosh.. shud i get out more? i don wanna meet new ppl, don wanna make new frens, don wanna talk to other ppl.. unless life makes me. i mean, i'm perfectly happy so wat if i don make new frens or get to noe new ppl? oh sher wud prob be disappointed in tht sentence. i gues mayb cos sunny is playin a big part in my life and i'm jus contented to have him and i'm contented wit my gang of frensa and family. i aredi have enough to do without somemore stuff..
but whre's the spirit? the funk? the excitement and adventure? thre's time for me to do those wen i'm older. YOU ARE YOUNG!! LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST!! BUT DON SMOKE, DO DRUGS OR PROSTITUTE. or other bad things for tht matter. get out girl! get out of ur cooped up shell of a life. fly urself, out of the fluffy feather-downed nest u made for urself. NOW is the time to go out and make new GOOD friends. and always keep the LORD by your side. protect urself and be all tht you can be.
what sher said wen she didn wan BGR was true. it makes u stop goin out, stop meetin new ppl, stop knowin new ppl. you get reli known to be anti-social or shy. and wen ur in tht relationship, u don realize u are not gettin to know ppl, who can all play a part in helping urself to grow. oh i've made a mistake of shuttin myself from the world, of jus concentratin on sunny. self-realization is reli good. try it sometime. but don worry my faithful readers, i'm not breakin up wit sunny anytime soon. in fact, i hope we be together forever.
but now since i self-realized, i shud get to work on self-improve. lol. sounds lyk u noe the instant kind of foodstuff or thing. this God-made product/human is:
1) self-improving
2) self-realizing
3) self-oriented
4) self-absorbed
5) self-motivating
6) self-consuming
and best of all: self-destructing.

THE END
12:46:00 pm
BLOGGIN IN SKUL AGAIN... AND ITS IN CAPS COS I'M LAZY TO CHANGE IT.

i mean cos inputtin the books into the new online library management system requires it to be all in caps. anyway, if daniel didn mention it i gues i wud have forgot abt it. tht is my way of improving myself. tho i'd dearly love for me not to be lyk tht. but i've been considerably busy this wk. i havn even managed to replace my duty days. sigh..

but i do devotion now. once a day. havn do yet today. sunny's in sing now. for 3 days. pls tell me i wont miss him. but cait and i have a surprise up our sleeves. for a special someone. and tht secret is not here bcos if i told u it wudn be a surprise anymore rite? hehe.. ltr on tht. if i don get too busy. which will have a direct effect on u cos i know not many read my blog but those who do appreciate true art and have excellent taste. lol. and it will afect them cos they loyally read my blog every single day to keep themselves posted on the famous happenings in my life. (actually that was jus psycological mumbo jumbo so tht my readers wud feel guilty and start readin this blog everyday. X)

well my life now isn very interesting, unless u mean tv is interesting. or a PS2. i mean i'm not bored of them, im jus not into much tv or PS games. my bro is. i know i know, i'm weird.. i used to think ppl who didn lyk tv or comp or any other kinds of games, were crazy, nuts and other words u can think that mean brainless. but for the young (or should i say younger?) readers out thre, here are a few insights to the life of old ppl. as u grow older, u mature and u don get so interested in electronic games anymore. of cos there are ppl hu nvr grow up but they are a diff story. i'm not sayin u shud hury up and grow. actually MY view is we shud take things as life gives them to us. but i digress. point is, i don usually play comp games, watch movies or tv shows. ppl hu think my life is sad, hands up!

but surprisingly my life isnt tht sad after all. at least i don think so. and thts wht matters rite? after all its MY life. actually wht do i do then? hmm... wake up play, eat, sleep, read, exercise, eat sleep. hey! there are more eats and sleeps than anythin else! ah... i see. but i don feel tht i eat or sleep a lot. i tink all the extra time in between is filled wit messagin sunny. and other stuff i do is tuition i guess.

sigh.. see? thts wat i mean by wastin time. actually, tht IS wasting time. mm... spm, cannot waste anymore time. oh well. i'm left for u to judge. you can judge me but not my family. i tink someone said that. chaoz.