Once upon a time, long after the feminist revolution dawned and yet before we could spell the word–let alone understand it–we were little girls. We knew we were equals to boys and no one was going to tell us we weren’t going to play kickball at recess with the toughest of them.
But if little Johnny knocked me over and didn’t stop to smile and help me up, well, then I told all of my friends he was a jerk. And this idea of “I’m as good as you so treat me like a princess” found itself a little home in our confused minds and it took over…without an invitation.

As we awkwardly tiptoed into the land of dating, this entire concept, fraudulent as it seems, was still very real. I’ve always been independent, strong, confident, smart (maybe a little full of myself, too), and was taught to believe that no guy could outdo me in ANYthing. So why did my mom tell me to let Eric pay for dinner on my first date? Why did my friends think it was “sweet” that he opened doors for me? How can we truly be equals if chivalry is still a card in this game?
Accepting the traditional nods from men that corner us into the position of being a “lady” directly contradicts so many other expectations that we have for men outside of dating.

And to tell you the truth, I feel sorry for guys these days. Many of my male friends complain to me that they have no idea what a girl wants.

“On one hand, she feels cheap and sexualized when you buy her a drink and on the other, she is insulted if you don’t at least offer.”
Chivalry is dying and we are killing it with our back and forth ideas of what a MAN today should be.

If we are all we crack ourselves up to be–independent, strong, confident, smart, AND capable of getting the same jobs as our male counterparts, then why on earth would we cling to these now foreign concepts of chivalry? It made sense for men to pay the way for their lady friends when ladies didn’t work, but things have changed.
So what’s our excuse?
Is it, in fact, fair for us to keep these romanticized notions as a standard for the men we meet?
Well, yes, you know what? It is.

I want to be his equal and I want to be his princess. But the only way this works is… if he’s my prince.
Men today cannot win me over with their roses nor their fortune. If a man wants to treat me like his damsel in distress, he will not get very far. I do not want to need him. (Nor do I need to). I simply need to want him. However, if we can both give and if we can both take and if we can both share, then f*ck it, lets ride off into the sunset together.


by Elizabeth